All of us at some point of time would definitely have come across a scenario where saying a subtle “NO” feels like a humongous task. Whether we are dealing with our friends, relatives, partners,etc, we feel saying “No” might damage or weaken the bonds we have with the person in question. Generally we give in by feeling we value the relationship more, so everything is fair and justified. But is that so?
You need to ask yourself the following two questions-
Do YOU love Yourself?
Do YOU value your relationship?
The first question would definitely make sense to all of you, but its the second question which doesn’t ring a bell, right? Well, let me explain.
In any relation, we are obliged to do certain things. Sometimes we go out of our way to make the other person happy. But does the other person recognize the effort? Does the other person feel the pain you have taken to accomplish a task that they wanted done from you? If yes, well, you might go ahead and do the same. But keep in mind your own happiness, and your self-esteem first. If you feel a certain way, make the other person understand. Lets say, your friends want to go out for a movie with you. But that day you are not feeling well and say “No”. If your friends are genuinely concerned about you, they will definitely understand and may even come to your place to cheer you up.
But consider this scenario. One of your friends is leaving the country the next day for higher studies or work and it will be a long time before you all can get the time to catch up. At this point, you need to make a choice. If possible, you should restrain from saying “No” and go ahead with the plan. Again , its based on the circumstances.
But always saying “Yes” just to save the relationship makes people take you for granted. They assume you will always be there for them whenever they need you and it might not be the other way round.
So along with others, make sure to put yourself first at times. Because its YOU who should be important to yourself first.
Please let me know in the comments section below if you liked it. And let me know your thoughts on this as well.